Category: Managing Stress

What does being denied mean?

This is part 2 of a 3-part series looking at different admission decisions: what they do and do not, mean; what you should you do and avoid doing in their wake; and what, if anything, is different this year due to Covid-19.  

While nobody loves being told maybe (as discussed last week with deferrals), I think we can all agree that a straight “no” is even harder. 

Bad news: that is where we are going today. Good news: I have as much experience hearing “no” as I do saying it. I was denied admission as a high school student; again by a few graduate schools; and in more recent years for jobs at other colleges. I may not hold the record on university denial letters, but I could make a run at the title.  

Whether you have recently received a deny, or you are waiting on an admission decision to come in the next few days or weeks, the tips and advice below come from lived (and deeply felt) experience.   

Denied Admission 

Prediction: In contrast to last week’s prognostication about more defers (and likely waitlist offers) across the board, I think denies will be like the relationship of a couple in a romantic comedy or the stock market during this pandemic—up and down… not always in that order.   

While overall I do think the percentage denied by most colleges in early rounds will go down (see this blog for rationale), some of  the colleges releasing decisions around this time of year are currently reporting bigger applicant pools. If the college you applied to is not increasing its class size, even if they both admit and defer more students, the raw number of denies could essentially be flat or even increase. 

In other words, still a lot of dream killing and tears in December.

What does being denied admission mean?   

It means “no.” Band-aid off, short letter, 86, time to move on. Some of you may not have needed all of those examples, but as a talented student and likely a really great person in general, I am guessing this is neither a word nor a concept you’ve experienced often.   

Being denied admission means that based on supply and demand, institutional priorities, or some combination of the two, they are unable to offer you admission. It means that even if you cheer for their team each season or just overpaid for a hoodie from their online bookstore or have eight family members who attended, they have closed the door.  

While I do not love being the one to put it so abruptly, I’ve seen some admission letters take three paragraphs to say “No” and others leaving you wondering if that is really what they said at all. Hint: If they don’t say “Congratulations!” in the first word or sentence, it’s likely a “No.” I’m not going to do you like that. Trust me- we have to start quick and rough in order to provide perspective and move on. 

What should you do?   

Scream, cry, beat your pillow, cook, or eat a lot of something. Whatever it takes to begin clearing your head. We all have different responses and emotions surrounding notifications of finality. And since I feel like we have already gone there at this point, I might as well be the one to tell you this is not the last time you’ll encounter these kinds of disappointments.  

One thing you need to hear, and maybe repeat back to yourself in the days and weeks after being denied, is that however you are feeling is both reasonable and understandable. Mad? Sad? Frustrated? Disappointed? I get it.   

What brings you joy or clears your head? Do those things. Go for a long drive, watch a funny movie, or eat a gallon of ice cream. What brings you perspective? Who totally gets you or can make you laugh or feel like the only person in the room? Be intentional about being in those spaces and with those people right now. 

Then you should start to move forward. Take some time to look at some of the college brochures laying around your room. Check your email from the last week and be reminded that you have lots of options and lots of choices.  

You are likely going to need to submit another application or two. If you’ve already got this covered, that’s great. If not, then good news—many great schools have deadlines in January. Look for colleges that interest you who have higher admit rates and lower academic profiles than the one(s) that denied you. 

What does being denied admission NOT mean?   

Being denied, especially from a selective institution (i.e. a lot of them releasing decisions right now) does not mean you are not smart, talented, capable, bound for future success, or a good person. These decisions are not perfect or perfectly fair.  

Being denied does not mean your effort to this point has all been in vain; that you did something “wrong” in your application; or that if you had either sent or not sent test scores the result would have been different. 

Do not second guess yourself—a denial from a college(s) does not mean that you are not going to get into the other schools to which you applied (an actual question/comment from my neighbor’s daughter last week).  

What should you AVOID doing?  

Do not look backward. Please do not accuse Mr. Wilson of writing you a crappy recommendation letter; tell Mrs. Jenks that if she had just bumped your 9th grade Geography grade from an 89 to a 93 (especially after turning in your amazing extra credit project on the “Primary Tributaries of the Mississippi River”) you would have been admitted; or question if you should have joined the Spanish club as a sophomore.  

Do not conflate or confuse the message. Please do not convince yourself the school that denied you was the only school where you could be happy (note: this is also true of relationships, jobs, etc. for the future). In my opinion, the terms “dream school” and “top choice” should be banned. 4,000 schools in the country. You may not feel okay right now, but you are going to be.  

Do not go for a long drive, watch a funny movie, and eat a gallon of ice cream simultaneously (just wanted to be sure you caught that “or” from earlier and did not think I was suggesting combining those).   

Please keep perspective. Do not send an expletive laced email rant to the college’s admission counselor cc’ing the President, Provost, multiple congressional representatives, and the entire Board. As I said earlier, this is all based in lived experience. In fact, we had one a few years ago that also copied—wait for it— our Governor, as well as the President and Vice President of the United States. (For those scoring at home I kept that one.)

Do not burn articles of clothing with that college’s logo. Instead, take a breath, do some good, and locate your closest Goodwill.   

Over the years I’ve written extensively about my own personal re-routes, as well as the experiences of students, family, and friends in hopes of providing solace when something you hope for doesn’t go as planned:

Please hear me say again: however you are feeling right now (or in the days and week after receiving a denial) is both reasonable and understandable.

What you need to avoid is sitting in that particular emotion for too long. Do not get stuck; do not stay down. I understand if you do not want to hear or believe this right now, but I can say with absolute confidence through repeatedly lived experience,  It Works Out.  

I’ll see you on The Other Side. 

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What does being deferred mean?  

Listen to “Next Steps for Deferred Students & Behind the Scenes of Decision Release Week” on Spreaker.

Recently we modified the final portion of our podcast to field listener questions from Instagram, Twitter, and Reddit. If you have something you want us to tackle, feel free to tag @gtadmission.

A few recent inquiries surrounded how to prepare for the various admission decisions that will be coming out from colleges and universities in the next few weeks, and how/if we think anything will be different this year due to the pandemic.

Since we know you are busy with classes and your time is limited right now, we will hit the highlights of each possible EA/ED decision (deferred, denied, admitted) over the next few weeks and put a few podcasts out on these topics as well.

Deferred

Prediction: I think more students will be deferred this year by selective schools than they have in the past. Keep in mind enrollment managers are doing exactly what their job title says: managing enrollment (you come here for the deep stuff, I know).

Colleges are closely, and quite nervously, watching their spring enrollment numbers. What will retention look like if students were disappointed with their fall experience on campus, online, or in some hybrid delivery mode? If they take an additional financial hit, they will likely be looking to build an even bigger first-year class for the summer or fall of 2021.

Additionally, they have lots of questions about how to predict this year’s admitted student behavior:

  • Will yield go down as a result of test score optional policies?
  • Will international students be able to receive visas at pre-pandemic rates?
  • Will the financial fallout of Covid-19 deteriorate yield of domestic students?

All of this means they will likely defer a higher percentage of early applicants in order to wait and see what they can learn about vaccines, infection rates, economic recovery… you know, little stuff like that.

What does being deferred mean?  

It means maybe, hold on, we’re not sure, we’d like to see more. Better than No? Yes. Ideal? Nope.

Being deferred means you have more waiting to do, and that is not easy or fun. This year more than ever before, though, I want to urge you to finish the drill. More defers does not necessarily mean more admits in the spring, but in many cases I think it will. And that is likely true from the waitlist too, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.  

You are likely going to need to submit another application or two. If you’ve already got this covered, that’s great. If not, then good news—many great schools have deadlines in January. Look for colleges that interest you who have higher admit rates and lower academic profiles than the one(s) that deferred you.

What should you do?  

First, read the letter, subsequent emails, and portal instructions closely. Then do what they say.

You are going to have some more work to do. Inevitably, you will need to send in fall grades, so finish this semester strong. Colleges that defer you will want to see how you’ve done in a challenging senior schedule (especially an abnormal junior spring term), or if your upward grade trend will continue, or how you are adjusting based on responsibilities outside the classroom. You may need to write an additional essay, have an online interview, or complete a form indicating continued interest or discussing updates on your fall activities.

What does being deferred NOT mean?  

It does not mean they are questioning your ability, talent, intelligence or potential match for their school. I understand we all desire instant gratification, but don’t miss the fact that the admission process can teach you some lifelong lessons (for example, some things are worth waiting for; some things do not happen your first time out; sometimes getting put on hold gives you a chance to reflect).

While both words start with “De,” being deferred does not mean you are denied. If a school did not think you were competitive or a good fit, they would have denied you. This sounds harsh but it’s true. Disappointed? Understood. 2020 has been a clinic in disappointment, so I feel you. But 2020 has also reminded us about patience, seeing the positives, and keeping perspective. You got this.

What should you AVOID doing? 

Please do not take being deferred as code for “try harder” by sending 18 additional letters of recommendation, stalking admission counselors on social media, going to see a fortune teller, or getting a tattoo of four-leaf clovers + college logo on your back.

In my opinion, particularly based on the enrollment uncertainty I described above, you should not write off a school you have strong interest in at this point in the cycle. Hold on, send us some stuff, tell us more– you can do that. Unless you have gotten into another college that is a better match for you, then I strongly encourage you to see this through.

Want to know more about being deferred? Read on. And on. And on.

Next week we will delve into what it means to be denied admission. 

College Admission: Read, See, Discuss (…and Be Thankful)

Listen to “Episode 25: I Applied… Now What? (And More Questions From YOU!)- Rick Clark” on Spreaker.

In my 11 years (and all of the months of 2020) serving as director of admission at Georgia Tech, I’ve had three assistants. Their individual personalities vary widely, but they have all been incredibly talented and deeply committed to helping our entire team succeed.

In addition to the hundreds of other roles they play, one key part of the job description (not listed on the official HR site) is keeping me in the loop on what’s really happening with our staff.

What do they need and want? What is bothering them? What do they need to know? And in general, how can we make their day to day life better?

Over the years, feedback has ranged from family leave policies to microwaves and from office sharing challenges to invaluable suggestions. At some time or another, each of them has started that portion of our meeting with: “I don’t know how you’re going to feel about this…” Or “Don’t take this the wrong way, but…” That’s when I know something specific to me is coming.

A few years ago, my assistant gently (but very clearly) said that while our team really appreciates all of the articles and podcasts and other collateral I send them each week, it can also be overwhelming to get so many emails about varying issues and topics, especially during the busiest times of our cycle.

Noted and valid. So, we came up with the idea for a Friday Newsletter specifically for staff entitled “Progress and Service,” in honor of Tech’s motto. Broken down into four sections: READ, WATCH, LISTEN, BUZZ (something related to GT), this allows me to share timely higher education- related information without totally spamming their inboxes.


Since next week is Thanksgiving and we won’t be publishing a blog, here are a few of the real gems I’ve heard, read, and seen lately in a consolidated (and relatively concise) format:

SEEN: One of my best friend’s just moved back to Atlanta. It’s been such a gift, especially during Covid-19, to get consistent time together. One thing I appreciate about him, and something I’ve seen up close lately, is how quickly he will reach out to his friends and network when he needs a recommendation for an electrician or a place to buy good produce.

While those are mundane examples, this also translates to his work as well, and it is illustrative of his overall humility and desire to improve.

As you go through your college admission experience, I hope you will emulate this by continually asking: “Who do I know that can help me? Who knows more than me about x or y?”

Who can provide you honest feedback and help you edit (not re-write) your essay?

Who has been through interviews or interviews people regularly?

Who has experience in financial planning or explaining debt, loans, long term implications of return on investment?

Bottom line: USE YOUR NETWORK. If you are considering visiting, applying to, or ultimately attending a certain college and don’t reach out to an alum of  your high school, former teammate, or neighbor who is already there, you are missing a big opportunity.

People want to help you. Friends, family, current college students, want to use their experience and knowledge to see you succeed, find your best match, and ultimately be confident in your college admission experience.  It’s on you to reach out.

DISCUSSED: Todd Rinehart is the VP-Enrollment at the University of Denver and the President of NACAC. On a panel recently, he beautifully outlined a truth that most high school students forget when they think about college admission. You control most of this experience.

  • Of the thousands of schools in this country, you decide which ones you want to apply to. In other words, if you apply to seven colleges, you eliminated 99% of possible places. You select where you apply.

So, if you’re about to hit submit on an app (or you have recently), you should celebrate that decision. I hope you will literally say out loud when you hit submit, “Of all the colleges and universities in the nation, I’m choosing to apply to you.” Does that sound corny or cheesy (and more importantly why these midwestern foods associated with that concept)? Trust me. If your mentality when you apply is one of excitement about each college you apply to, then you are preparing yourself well for the rest of this experience.

  • Now, you do not control whether or not you are admitted, or the level of financial aid you receive. That part is out of your hands. Don’t sit around worrying about it. Don’t drive yourself nuts constantly hitting refresh on portals or emailing admission counselors asking them if decisions may be out earlier. Wait well.
  • You choose from your options. Ball is back in your court. If you listened to your counselor, did your research, and were honest with yourself about the set of schools you applied to, you are going to have choices.

People who have never been through the college admission experience often think the goal of this is to get into a certain place. Admission professionals, whether they are on the high school or university side, know the real truth- your goal is to have choice and options.

In the spring of your senior year, you will be able to sit down with the schools who have admitted you, look over your financial aid packages, revisit your goals, hopes, and dreams, listen to your parents insight, advice, and encouragement, and make a choice. That is what this is all about, friends. Don’t let some hack tell you otherwise.

  • At this point, you own and control 66% of this exchange. But I think this pandemic has taught us there is a fourth piece- also one you control. You decide how you show up at the place you ultimately pick. Bam- 75%! (With grade inflation in some schools that is an A.)

This fall has stretched and challenged us all, but I’ve been deeply encouraged by the resilience and spirit of the students I work with on a weekly basis on campus (so I wrote to them to say THANK YOU).

They regularly say, “You know. It’s not perfect, but I am so glad I’m here.” Or “I love being  with my friends and we are finding ways to have fun and enjoy our semester.” Even when the pandemic ends, you are going to find situations or elements of your college that are not perfect.  Your job is to arrive ready to embrace the new community you choose, build a new network, and take advantage of opportunities. That mentality and approach is all up to you.

READ: My friend and co-author Brennan Barnard wrote a great piece in Forbes recently. Per usual he tackles some of the most pressing and relevant conversations happening in college admission with balance, empathy, and (see #1) by leaning on the wisdom of experts. His piece covers the truth about: test score optional; high school quotas; the “magic formula” of getting in; gap year impact on the Class of 2021; how COVID-19 is impacting the college admission world. In some ways, it’s his version of “Progress and Service.” No wonder we get along.

BONUS- On a hike this week, my son asked, “Dad. You know how there is a yellow sun and an orange sun, and also a blue moon?”

Yeah…

“Well, is there a blue sun?”

Hmm…I’m not sure. Let’s look that up (turns out the answer is … kind of).

I get these kinds of questions from my kids constantly. Con-stant-ly. About former first ladies, minor powers of super-heroes, whether penguins are mammals, and the list goes on. But it’s great and I do my best when I don’t know the answer to look things up with them.

I’m imploring you not to lose that child-like curiosity and willingness to ask questions in your college admission experience. All of the points, Brennan makes in his article, you can ask individual colleges. What is on your mind? What do you want to know or ask? Do it. That’s why colleges employ admission counselors—to be available to you and help you get answers to your important, specific, and critical questions. Ask YOUR questions. Whether that is about majors or residence halls or admission policies or origins of mascots or vegan options in the dining hall. Part of being a good college student is being curious, being proactive, and constantly asking questions. Start now!

Happy Thanksgiving, friends. Thank you reading our blog and listening to our podcast. This year in particular I’m hopeful  you will pause, reflect, and embrace life’s simple moments and joys in the week ahead.

The Future of College Admission?

Listen to “Episode 22: The Future of College Admission? – Rick Clark” on Spreaker.

Let me start by saying this: I’m no futurist. My family is quick to point out I’m wrong multiple times a day on a variety of subjects (game outcomes, how long to bake chicken, etc.) My co-workers can also enumerate many occasions when I’ve been dead wrong about direction, strategy, and approach.

But recently, whether it’s a virtual panel or webinar, a television, radio, or podcast interview, or even last week’s (virtual) fireside chat, the big question seems to be, “What’s the future of admission and enrollment?”

So, while I’m painfully aware that I don’t have all of the answers (and I’m not booking a flight to Vegas  to put cash on these predictions), I do see some distinct writing on the higher education wall for the year ahead.Perspective

(1) Most colleges will see fewer, or the same, rather than more applications this year.

Covid-19 hit colleges across the country extremely hard. Last week the National Clearinghouse published its most recent numbers. Overall enrollment is down 4%. Enrollment of first-year students is down 16.1% from 2019 (even more disturbing is that community colleges saw a 22.7% dip in enrollment).

As much as we’re all fatigued by this pandemic, it is not over. The financial impact on families, businesses, and communities is yet to be fully felt. As a result, I foresee 2021 seniors casting a narrower net when applying to college resulting in a lower application: student ratio.

Say what you will about testing, but those scores did provide a way for students to nod to schools and colleges to send them recruitment and application information. The mass cancellations and ensuing test-optional landslide has severely limited a big part of how colleges solicit applications through what we call “search.” Don’t get me wrong, I’m not crying about the The College Board or ACT coffers taking a financial hit. However, this traditional source of names and leads did generate thousands of applications nationally in the past, and nothing to this point has proven to directly replace it.

Talk to any admission person and they’ll tout how they’ve stood up more virtual visits and reached higher numbers of students through online programming, tours, or sessions. This is a great silver lining of Covid for both the short- and long-term. However, student Zoom fatigue combined with colleges’ inability to host families on campus and travel to high schools and communities will further deflate applications overall.

Going test score optional (TSO) normally serves to increase applications. But we’ve never seen this many schools go TSO at the same time. My guess is some will see a bump due to this change in policy, but the majority will not.

(2) Admit rates at most schools will go up this year.

Sure. This will in part be a function of flat (or less) applications, but it’s also a response to what we’ve experienced over the last two semesters in higher education. As Clearinghouse data shows, many schools lost undergraduates this year. Translation: they took a major financial hit and need to find ways to recover.

Public universities are going to be under pressure to grow. Those with big brands will be counted on by their state to buoy their overall system. With the tail of Covid coming like Smaug’s in Lord of the Rings, state appropriations to public schools will inevitably be hit hard. Growth expectations, reduced appropriations, and family financial uncertainty as a result of the pandemic all point to more offers of admission to make (and especially to attempt to grow) enrollment.

At privates, especially non-research institutions, tuition is the life blood. Given Covid’s impact on retention and finances last spring and into this fall (not to mention growing trepidation about Spring 2021) I expect these colleges to admit more students in hopes of remedying recent enrollment/net tuition revenue loss.

Let me be clear. There are going to be exceptions to this. Ivy League and Ivy-like schools with multibillion-dollar endowments will likely not be affected as much, so please don’t email me in six months saying I predicted Princeton’s admit rate was going to double. But here again we’re reminded those places are outliers and anomalies, not the signposts, in American Higher Education.

(3) Yield in general declines nationally.

The number or percentage of students who accept an offer of admission and pay an enrollment deposit is known as yield. In recent years, NACAC reported the average yield rate is approximately 33% (College Transitions provides a helpful yield breakdown by institution). Oregon State’s Jon Boeckenstedt produced this visualization earlier this week, which provides Roundabouteven more insight on the challenges and trends with yield and “draw rates.”

Given financial, medical/ health, and travel (distance from home) concerns, as well as the likelihood of most colleges admitting more students, I project yield will again decrease at most schools around the country.

(4) International applications decrease.

In recent years, I’ve had the opportunity through the State Department’s Office of Overseas Schools to travel to consulates and embassies abroad speaking to Americans and their contacts about higher education in the U.S.

During this time, I’ve seen a palpable shift in the conversations about college in America. Other nations, including Canada, Australia, Spain, and the Netherlands, among others, have become far more competitive and aggressive in their recruitment of students around the world.

Add political rhetoric, less than glowing media coverage about the pandemic in the United States, and the fragility of this demographic (which has been a boon for American colleges and universities, particularly since the 2008 recession) only increases. College admission officers’ inability to travel abroad this year further exacerbates the issue– and strengthens predictions 1-3.

(5) Bigger waitlists = longer cycle.

Selective colleges are going to hedge their bets on yield rates. This means they will likely put even more students on waitlists and start pulling students earlier in the cycle (in other words, expect to see more mid-April admits as healthy colleges see deposits roll come in).

Higher education is an ecosystem. As schools continue build their classes Admission Listthrough waitlist offers in May and June, they will be pulling those students away from other colleges. This activity and domino effect will extend deep into the summer, just as it did in 2020. We anticipated a more extended cycle as a result of NACAC’s CEPP adjustments and Covid has served to further elongate that timeline.

(Bonus) Gap year concern… not a thing.

I’m a Presbyterian and we normally stick to three or five points in a speech or article. But since so many have asked about gap years, I’ll include a bonus piece here. 

Harvard made news with 20% of their first-year students opting to take a gap year. This article lists a few other examples, such as Williams, Bates, and MIT, with big increases in gap year students. Understandably, since the press loves to cover schools like “Stanvard,” this has understandably raised concerns among 2021 high school graduates.

As I said earlier, I’ve been on a lot of panels with friends and colleagues from around the country lately. All of them (literally all of them) from schools with 7% to 77% admit rates, are saying the same thing: 2020 gap years are not “taking seats” from 2021 graduates.

Hopefully, everything I’ve laid out in this blog serves to reinforce one point—COLLEGES NEED STUDENTS! Now more than ever.

If the financial argument or the international argument or the health argument doesn’t convince you, here are Tech’s numbers. We granted about 130 gap years deferments. 49 of those will start this spring, 10 in the summer, and the rest next fall. We are not counting these students into our predictive model, but rather adding them to our new classes each term. In other words, they’re “extra seats” not “taking seats.”

Final Thoughts

If you are a junior, sophomore, ninth grader… all of this basically applies to you too. Higher education had its eye squarely on 2025 before the pandemic. Known as the “demographic cliff” we were all planning and preparing our administrations for a decrease in high school graduates, and therefore even more competition and enrollment instability. Covid has fast forwarded us toward the cliff. All of that to say, the future of higher education is trending towards higher admit rates and more options for students.

If you are a senior… I hope this gives you a bit of solace. If your goal in applying to college is to have choices and options (and it should be), I see that coming to fruition this year, assuming you choose a balanced list.

I know that high school is not wrapping up the way you’d hoped or envisioned (if you did envision this, please call me, as we’re working on predictive future models and I could use your help. Plus, we could make a killing in Vegas). However, if you can keep your head up, keep working hard in school and in your community, and maintain a long-term vision during a challenging time, I earnestly believe you’re going to come out of this better, stronger, and more prepared for wherever you end up in college next year.

If you are college counselor or college admission professional… Thank you! You’re probably not hearing that enough lately. We work under severe deadlines, many levels of scrutiny, and increasing pressure. If you’ve not heard it from anyone else this week, please slowly read this: THANK YOU! Thanks for all you are doing for your institution, students, and surrounding community. This is not easy work, but it is ineffably meaningful. Take care of yourself so you can keep taking care of those around you.

Covid is pushing and stretching us all. Throw in a contentious election season and divisive rhetoric on all mediums and it’s no wonder we are all exhausted. I hope in the days ahead you’ll find creative ways to renew, refresh, and share small moments of joy with those around you. Be well, friends.

Five Important Lessons from Covid-19

Listen to “Episode 21: Important Lessons from Covid-19 – Rick Clark” on Spreaker.

Stay at home orders in March, and the phased re-entry we have experienced since, has given us plenty of time to be with family members. If you are like me, this has been both beautiful and challenging. I’ve frequently found myself simultaneously thinking, “I love you,” and “Wow. I need some space.”

In our house, proximity and time have led to some healthy conversations and important debates on issues ranging from politics to healthcare to fashion to sports. Most of these exchanges have led to either a greater understanding of one another or a willingness to respectfully disagree.

Six months into quarantine, one major topic remains unresolved: PG-13 movies. We have a 12-year-old son and a 9-year-old daughter. In my mind, it’s easy to round up for our son. My thinking is I’d rather be there for exposure to references, specific words, or other content. While my wife does not totally disagree with that mentality, our daughter is her sticking point.

“How are you possibly rounding up from nine? You can’t even do that by decades.”

Point taken. Honestly, my problem is more with the lack of consistency in the ratings system. First, 80’s movies rated PG would definitely be Rated R today (although I’m not broaching that because it would reduce our options by about 25%). Second, The Hunger Games is PG-13. Who is in charge here?

Ferris BuellerThankfully, she has relented on a few must see PG-13 films, including Blind Side, Black Panther, Hamilton, and The Avengers.  One I came across the other night was Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.  Colorful language, stealing a car, lying to parents, skipping school, and tormenting the principal? No point even watching the trailer.

However, I did share a key quote from the opening scene with my kids: “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

Covid has pushed pause on an increasingly frenetic world. If you are a high school student, I hope you will take a page out of Ferris’ book—STOP. Look around. And don’t miss these five important lessons:

Consider what you do and don’t miss.

If summer baseball was canceled and you have been having dreams about curveballs and sacrifice flies, pay attention to that. When the things we truly love are taken away, we ache for them. Is there a class this fall not meeting in person and you are bummed about it? That is likely a sign of a subject you have a true affinity for versus one you’ve been told is important or one you should like/take.

Conversely, what are you relieved to get out of? Our daughter was over half way to her black belt in Taekwondo when Covid hit. Last Sunday I was helping her clean out her closet. I stepped away for a few minutes and when I came back she had discreetly wedged her uniform in the Goodwill bag between some dresses and pants.

What is your taekwondo? What have you been on the hamster wheel with and are now realizing is not really your thing? Pay attention to both sides of the coin academically, extra-curricularly, and relationally, because these are critical signposts as you consider which colleges and cultures best fit your personality, goals, and interests.

Control what you can control.

You can order from your favorite restaurant, you just can’t eat inside. You can go to the park but you won’t be able to sit on the benches. While experiencing limitations or being reminded we don’t control everything in life is never a fun lesson, it is good preparation for your admission experience. Students often feel like the admission process “happens to them.” Much is made in the press and school communities about who doesn’t get in or didn’t receive a specific scholarship.

As a result, it’s easy to lose sight of the fact that three-fourths of the experience is up to you. You choose where to apply. Then we choose whom to admit. After that, the ball is back in your court as you receive multiple offers and choose where you attend. And the one often left out, but arguably most important: You choose to maximize the resources and network your college offers. In this regard, I think Covid has been a good primer for college admission (and life well beyond). I am hopeful that perspective, relative importance, self-confidence, and personal agency will triumph over the fleeting disappointment of one or two closed doors.

Things change. You adapt.

Before you get up from reading this blog, take some time to appreciate all you have adjusted to over the last six months (six months!). You have demonstrated phenomenal resilience. Nobody would have chosen this situation. Any adult will tell you how sorry they are that your high school experience has been truncated or altered because of the pandemic.

And yet…and yet… you are here. You haven’t lost sight of your goals. You are undeterred. You are resolute. You are building powerful, lifelong muscles of adaptability, resilience, and vision of the future that will provide critical strength and skills as a college applicant, a college student, and well into life after graduation.

Money Matters.

This spring and summer colleges received more appeals and petitions for re-evaluation of financial aid packages than ever before. Covid has served as a harsh reminder of just how fast stocks can drop, markets can shift, and entire sectors can take brutal economic hits. The bottom line is your college list should not only have a range of academic profiles and selectivity levels, but also account for affordability.  While this is not a perfect proxy, I encourage you to strongly consider applying to at least one in-state public university and/or community college.

Before you submit an application be sure to initiate a conversation with your family about: a) their ability/willingness to pay for your college education, b) any limitations or conditions they have about the type of school they will or won’t pay for, c) their expectations of your contributions financially, including loans, jobs during college, etc.  This blog expounds on those topics and important questions.

It’s Not Over.

At the end of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, the credits begin to roll after he again says, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” But then there are actually two more brief scenes. If history is any indicator, we will not see another global pandemic in our lifetime. This time pause was hit for you. I hope you won’t miss the critical lessons above. But most importantly, I hope you will make a practice out of stopping and looking around. If Covid has taught us nothing else, it is that life is precious. Don’t miss it!

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